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Idiot Feature: Kim’s Carpet Cuddle

Monday 29 September 2014
Words Darren Skene

This column would like to break from tradition and finally heed the words of parents, teachers and inspirational quotes on Facebook that ‘if you haven’t got anything nice to say, you shouldn’t say anything at all’. And since just not saying anything isn’t a possibility for editorial reasons, nice it will have to be.

Fitting in with this turning of a new leaf, one man in particular has recently come to my attention, a man whom I would now like to award the ever so prestigious award of ‘Idiot Feature’s Person of the Year’ to.

Despite this being a relatively new award, competition for the accolade was tough. Lily Allen put in a strong fight as ever with her services to Twitter and raising the profile of bolshy women everywhere, and there’s no ignoring Emma Watson’s recent UN speech. Hell, even Victoria Beckham was said to give her own stand out performance (in six inch heels, as nary a tabloid mentioned, reminding us all that that is how women are to be judged).

But all of these contributions to humanity, if not paled exactly in comparison to today’s winner’s achievements, are at least being widely credited elsewhere, so therefore it was only right to shine the spotlight on the underdog and give the prize to Ukranian journalist, Vitalli Sediuk.

Seduik is the ‘red carpet prankster’ who has already attempted to take out Brad Pitt, stuck his face in Leonardo DiCaprio’s crotch and snogged Will Smith. And today, news came to light that in his latest act, he tried to give Kim Kardashian a ‘cuddle, (an act mistakenly viewed by the world press, Kim and Kanye as more of a tackle than a cuddle, but hey, let’s not think the worst). Sediuk himself has described the act as a protest about not being allowed into America.

Well readers, what I can say other than that this is a man selflessly dedicating his life to showing appreciation of the stars we all follow, spreading the love and trying to put a smile on the rest of our faces. So for this, he is this column’s ‘Person of the Year’.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words so, to honour Seduik’s work, feast your eyes on a load of this.

The Kim Cuddle reaction:

kim kardashian cuddle

Here’s him expressing his admiration for America Ferrara:

How to Train Your Dragon 2  Photocall

Going for the kiss with Will Smith:


Getting in there with Bradley Cooper:


Leonardo’s money shot:

leo d

Accepting Adele’s Grammy for her:


And finally, doing something with Madonna:


Words: Amy Lavelle